What doesn't kill us...

...yeah yeah we know, makes us stronger. But it still sucks when bad things come along and sideswipe us.

I believe it's true. All of the big and little challenges in life are put there for a reason and how we handle them makes all the difference in the world.
For example, a bad breakup. Most of us have been there, done that. We make irrational choices, unnecessary phone calls, and cry bucket loads of tears. Sometimes to come out on the other side and think "wow, I wasted all of that energy on ______?" what was wrong with me???
But, you learned something didn't you? Maybe a weak spot within you, or that you made a bad choice or judgement call, or simply that the other person was a jerk and it really had nothing to do with you.

Nevertheless, you LEARNED something from it. Even if it's out of your control, (the worst) you hopefully grew as a person from it.

If you think about it, there are two things that cause change in life, a loss or a choice. Okay, on a more subtle level things can also "shift" and cause change. But when I say shift, I think of things like the weather. We planned for sun, it rained, the weather shifted... BUT how did the weather change affect your plans? Did it feel like "a loss"? You didn't "choose" it but you couldn't "control" it either.

If you made a bad choice, accept it and move forward for you cannot change the past. Yes there are extremes in bad choices... you can choose to do drugs or far worse or your can choose an ugly pair of shoes or a bad boyfriend. Nevertheless, once you make a choice and act upon it, it is done and cannot be changed. You can only learn and grow from it and hopefully there is that little place inside you that says "don't do that again".

Let me back up and repeat, YOU CANNOT CHANGE THE PAST. This is where acceptance comes in. (is that what I'm rambling about?) The past is just that... over, done, fine', kaput.

Take this moment for acceptance of the past. It is over and cannot be changed. Accept what is and move forward. Live in the present. The past is meant to be there for memories and a brief visit... it is not meant for an extended stay.

Now onto loss. Once again... many extremes. Uncontrollable loss of life, loss of love, loss of shoes (I love my shoes by the way). I will begin by saying that loss of life is not to be taken lightly in any manner and is not easy by any stretch. Especially abrupt loss or unforeseen circumstances. However, for those of you who have experienced loss on every level... life, love, shoes... know that deep inside you there is a part of you that can and will accept loss on every level.

We are strong creatures yet, our surroundings and our society tend to make us think that we are weak. As a race we have amazing ability to push through some of the worst situations... if we choose to. The human race has seen wars of insurmountable size compared to what we are fighting today not to mention famine, flood, drought, and crazy diseases yet we complain when our Internet connection is too slow... and we freak out because someone texts us to break up.

We all have the gift of love within us and the ability to forgive those who have hurt us (doesn't mean we have to like them!), accept those mistakes that we have made, and love and remember those who have loved us and left us behind to move on to a better place (*my personal beliefs, not necessarily yours) regardless of the circumstances.

Look inside you and find the strength within to conquer any battle that comes upon you... you have the gift.... use it.

This post was inspired and fueled by the passing of Radar Neill... my most amazing little 10lb sidekick for the past 13 years. Even in this loss, I am inspired by him each and every day and know I have the strength and the ability to move forward with him in my heart. Namaste, little man xo